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I was inspired by Pam's blog thismorning, and consequently decided to bare my own soul. Incidentally, thanks for sharing, Pam! I was also inspired by Andria's blog - so thanks Andria!
I too was in a bad place a few years ago. My dad died in 2004 and I was drinking too much. I got myself into a destructive relationship and a job that was no good for my fibromyalgia and was basically on self destruct mode for the best part of a year. I managed to get myself out of the destructive relationship, but something good happened; I met my husband through the horrible boyfriend, although I didn't know at that time. A year later when I did meet up with the HB's friend, I was back to working in an office (and this particular job is my favourite of all the jobs I have had!), although I was on sick-leave with fibromyalgia flare-ups following the flu. Then I got sacked for not being fit to do the job I was employed to do. I was devastated. I drank more. I got myself into debt, despite the money my dad had left me in his will.
Then I met my husband's three children (my future step-children, although I didn't know it at that point) and his parents and shortly after Jay proposed to me. I was overwhelmed and happier than I had ever been! Then I had a knee operation that basically immobilised me for three months, during which time my body weight increased by 50%. I got more depressed and angry at myself, my friends and family, my previous employer and the world in general.
Then I took a step back and really evaluated my life. Did I really want to be this negative person for the rest of my life? No, I definitely did not. So I let go of the negativity, with a lot of help from Jay.
It has been a long journey, but despite still being in pain most of the time and having limited mobility, I am happier than I have ever been. If I had not made these changes to myself I probably would not still have Jay in my life, and certainly wouldn't have two lovely step-children living with us; which means we wouldn't be moving on Tuesday. People no longer avoid phoning me or talking to me. True, they don't visit me at home very often, but maybe that will change when we move and are less crowded. Maybe it won't, but I don't mind either way because I am happy with my life, and it's not because of the anti-depressants (which I still have to take, incidentally); it's because of Jay, Ollie and Issy. So I am dedicating this post to them and the rest of my family, whom I love very much.
I think I'd better sign off now before I start crying!
I too was in a bad place a few years ago. My dad died in 2004 and I was drinking too much. I got myself into a destructive relationship and a job that was no good for my fibromyalgia and was basically on self destruct mode for the best part of a year. I managed to get myself out of the destructive relationship, but something good happened; I met my husband through the horrible boyfriend, although I didn't know at that time. A year later when I did meet up with the HB's friend, I was back to working in an office (and this particular job is my favourite of all the jobs I have had!), although I was on sick-leave with fibromyalgia flare-ups following the flu. Then I got sacked for not being fit to do the job I was employed to do. I was devastated. I drank more. I got myself into debt, despite the money my dad had left me in his will.
Then I met my husband's three children (my future step-children, although I didn't know it at that point) and his parents and shortly after Jay proposed to me. I was overwhelmed and happier than I had ever been! Then I had a knee operation that basically immobilised me for three months, during which time my body weight increased by 50%. I got more depressed and angry at myself, my friends and family, my previous employer and the world in general.
Then I took a step back and really evaluated my life. Did I really want to be this negative person for the rest of my life? No, I definitely did not. So I let go of the negativity, with a lot of help from Jay.
It has been a long journey, but despite still being in pain most of the time and having limited mobility, I am happier than I have ever been. If I had not made these changes to myself I probably would not still have Jay in my life, and certainly wouldn't have two lovely step-children living with us; which means we wouldn't be moving on Tuesday. People no longer avoid phoning me or talking to me. True, they don't visit me at home very often, but maybe that will change when we move and are less crowded. Maybe it won't, but I don't mind either way because I am happy with my life, and it's not because of the anti-depressants (which I still have to take, incidentally); it's because of Jay, Ollie and Issy. So I am dedicating this post to them and the rest of my family, whom I love very much.
I think I'd better sign off now before I start crying!
optimistic